Last night I weeped like a baby.
You know the unattractive tears,where the salt from your eyes start to mix with the salt from your nose and it felt good to cry.
It felt good to get out every pent up inside hurt that I have been holding on to for the life of me. Using pain as my identity.
But last night, when I weeped like a baby, I didnt feel ashamed of my tears. I know we live in a society where eye mist is a weakness but I say screw this, my tears are my strength. I shed tears to cleanse the pain, to fill the potholes in my heart. My tears create new memories out of old wounds, brings a smile to my face on the ugliest of days. I am triumphant when I cry. My tears have constructed a new day. Crying shows growth, ya know? That’s why we cry so much as children because we grow so rapidly, our minds cannot keep up with the changes. So we cry for the things that will never be again like Saturday morning cartoons or the simplicity of our problems, like ice cream is a fixer for all wounds. We cry as children and we are proud of our tears, we parade up and down isleways at shopping centers with our tears so that people will know and hopefully identify with our pain. We see no shame! I grew and I grew but I died and I died til my pain was something I wasnt even aware of. The ducts in my eyes had become a dry and bearen land. Til my vision was clouded with the dust of my desert dreams. Begging “Someone please come water me!!!!” So I blinked, hoping the moisture would fool my eyes long enough to get thru this lifetime. But low and behold something traumatic happened and I was kidnapped and held hostage by my own demons for the ransom of water. I swallowed hard and blinked an ample amount but it wasnt enough. I begged my eyes whom I had forsakened a long time ago to “come thru for me this one time and I promise to take care of you.” And did you know my eyes took their sweet time to answer but my plea was granted and I was flooded by the ocean til I quenched my own thirst and drowned my own demons in their request. The irony of it all. I created my own demons and I created my own solution. I am my very own Super Hero, I saved my day, rescued myself from dispair by my own tears. So I proudly cry, til my eyes burn from the ashes of what once were. I cried myself into a destiny of freedom one tear at a time.